The more complicated that it is the reality for a slave, the hardest fight is not external, but internal.
Face him with his weaknesses is the first step to make him feel safer.
Each critical, destructive as it sounds, is an opportunity to know himself and instead of losing control or feeling attacked, should learn from it. If I make an action (in this case, critical) is for something.
To learn needs to be stimulated or punished, but for self-knowledge must be reflected as he is, and only when he recognizes his true limitations, can transcend them.
When we accept ourselves as we are, with our strengths and weaknesses, we are able to get our goals (material or personal) and fulfill them.
A submissive is going to surrender to his Mistress as he learns to trust on her, to be swayed without resistance.
Although it may seem a paradox, to achieve self-control is necessary to learn to relinquish control, because the fear of losing is the result of not wanting to lose the things that probably never were ours, but borrowed.
And, obviously, the Mistress’s self control is basic in the relationship. If we do not control our own impulses, we will can not control of others.